"Brain dead" is a popular expression in my family after someone had a large tumour removed. It's our way of spitting in the face of cancer.
In an office, it is insulting.
In your office, in your place, I would have walked up to the owner of the voice, into her personal space and asked her outright how she dared to be so rude to me. Waited for an answer. By that time, in an office, you probably have an audience, so everyone will get the message. :-)
I just got done with a long cancer battle, it was advanced stage and it was serious. I had chemo and radiation, and I've been getting scans for follow up. I managed to find a decent job with a very nice boss who I was up front with about my medical condition. By looking at me you cannot tell that I just got done with these treatments 4 months ago, also I am not 100% in the clear quite yet, although my PET scan is looking perfect, theres a slight chance I have a little pre-cancer developing again. I had to ask for a day off of work, and I told my boss it was for the scan. Then last week I told him that I was going to keep my cell phone on me and to please excuse me if I had to step out of the meeting because I was expecting a phone call with my results of the PET scan on that day. He has no problem with any of this, he's overly supportive. Soooooooo here's where we get to the part where I am PISSED OFF...
Yesterday my boss asks me "Did you ever hear back about that scan?" And I said "Yes, everything looked great, no cancer left" (a month prior a tiny speck of cancer had still been showing). Soooo a voice from the other office yells, "Cancer?! What did you do John, hire a HALF-DEAD PERSON?!"
So I told her "No, actually I am probably a lot more alive than you." and then when I went to get my jacket to go home for the day, I saw my boss walk up to her and quietly yell at her, I could see how mad he was.
BUT not things are going to be awkward. It's a new job, apparantly she did not know that I had cancer. And I am really mad. But I don't know how mad I should really be or what to do because it's just the 3 of us working in the office. I see her every day.
I mean but NOW things are going to be awkward...
Here is the best way to look at that awful incident: Would you yell at a severely retarded person for not being able to say the alphabet? In the same way, you are angry at the village idiot for engaging his mouth without checking to see if it was attached to his brain. This moron is not typical or life would be unbearable. Be thankful for two things: One your health is restored and two you had more sense the day you were born than that village idiot who blurted out his or her stupidity managed to obtain in a lifetime. What was said made him look bad, not you!
BTW, congratulations on winning then most important fight of your life!
There is no reason to be angry. It is only a waste of energy. People are rude and ignorant. Brush it off and keep om enjoying your life. I had cancer too and people had strange reactions. I set them straight and said "How about some encouragement? I don't need you bring me down and act like I'm going to die."
Rather than be angry, just remember how happy she must be because ignorance is bliss and apparently, she has a lot of ignorance. Anyone who's been through cancer knows your struggle and your fight. Congratulations on the winning battle. I love to hear of winning battles. After what you've been through, you are a lot better than that to let the ignorance of one person get to you. Don't waste your time on being angry. Just thank God for your happiness, good health, I'm willing to bet that this person is going to apologize because she didn't know you were worried about another tumor or that fact that you beat it. When she finds out, which by now your boss told her, she will apologize and maybe think twice before she opens her ignorant mouth to anyone else again. I'm happy for your survival. God bless
ADD Honey, I really don't think things will be awkward, I really believe she will see what she said was so off the wall, that she will apologize. If she doesn't, then just do your job and when you have to speak to her about anything, be normal. You catch more flies with honey, than vinegar, my mom used to say. It's true. She'll come around and if anyone should feel awkward, it should be her, not you. Good luck
Hello Elizabeth,
Dear god,some freaking comment and conversation !!!!!If you do not want things to escalate to the point of no return...disregard her comment ,your boss did the work or hopefully so.What would her comment have been if you had aids,full blown aids ?Or a very serious
Mental Health Issue ?? Ease -up she has to be misinformed or be very young!!!!!I will refrain from commenting any further but between you and me,she could get hit as hard as tou did ??
TT LY
Sincerely
First of all glad to hear your ok and everything looks good,great answers glad the good makes up for the bad in this world,She knew what she said so dont accept an apology from her forget aqbout her
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