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I have herpes, my boyfriend has eczema.. I'm afraid to sleep with him at all.. HELP!?

(5 posts)

  1. 1110011100
    Member

    My boyfriend has eczema that sometimes covers his penis, testicles, and upper thighs. I have genital herpes and I'm on suppressive therapy. We use condoms.

    How can I be sure that he isn't more susceptible to herpes because of his red and irritated skin?

    At this point, we have sex but he doesn't put it all the way in (even with condoms) I don't know how much longer I can do this.
    On one hand, I'm not satisfied sexually... Although he says he's happy and has been so wonderful through all of this. I go down on him, which is awesome, but not enough.
    On the other hand I don't ever want to put him at risk and I wonder if I should find a partner who's either positive for hsv or not so fragile in that area?

    Any help would be greatly appreciated, and if your answer is going to be one of "gross" or that I somehow contracted it in some awful way, save it. HSV is extremely common and I contracted it from a long term exclusive relationship when my boyfriend cheated on me. AWESOME, RIGHT?

    I want to do everything I can to not spread this to anyone else while also maintaining a somewhat normal way of life.

    Thanks so much!!!!

    Posted 2 years ago #

  2. Fd
    Member

    I have had herpes for 2 years now. I have had a few short term girlfriends since then, but have also hooked up with random girls without telling them, yes it's kinda fucked up but they never called back saying they got it. I have type 1, and only had the initial outbreak, and nothing since. I had sex frequently with the girlfriends, always wearing a condom and NEVER spreading it. There were even times when the condom broke, and I was fully inside them. If you guys really love each other it shouldn't stand in the way. The stigma behind it is horrible for people who don't have it, and because of that no one who has it ever talks about it. I'm sure you know plenty of people who secretly have it. As 1/5 of the population has it, it is something we have to come to terms with. That being said, out of those 5 people, 1 or 2 of them rarely get laid. So I would assume that a large percent of confident, good looking people who get laid fairly often, have herpes.

    Anyways, from my experiences I found that using a condom drops transmission rates drastically. If he is too worried about it now, he will be forever until he gets it. As a male, it amazes me he doesn't stick it all the way in, and if you aren't fully satisfied, talk to him about it. If he isn't willing to take one for the team, he's not right for you anyways right?

    Posted 2 years ago #

  3. clarrisea
    Member

    consider abstaining from sex during full outbreaks, and talking to your doctor about the safest times for avoiding spreading the infection.

    Posted 2 years ago #

  4. Guru
    Member

    If you are on suppressive therapy his risk is very low (in the order of 2%)

    His condition really doesn't make a difference.. its just any skin to skin contact when the virus is on your skin surface.

    I believe its his call to make, if he is happy with the odds then go for it.

    Posted 2 years ago #

  5. Evans
    Member

    Abstaining from sex would be a good idea for you to do right now..

    Posted 2 years ago #

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