5 days ago i started cutting my legs and while physically it feels right to me i want to stop doing it because i don't want my school to find out and call my parents because my dad has memory loss, yells a lot and never lets anything go (he will remember details about events but often cant properly remember who was involved in whatever events) , and my mom never seems to take my side for anything.
i also think the school might think im crazy if they found out, they already sent a police officer to my house a while ago thinking i was suicidal just cause of something i said, and now its documented that i hit my arm against the lockers (a teacher wrote me up and im supposed to stop which is what got me to try cutting).
i don't know whether this is related or not (and thus might or might not effect what might happen if the school found out about me cutting myself) but a lot of students are annoyed by things i cant bring myself to stop doing because i realize it annoys them but i just enjoy doing it too much (if they are nice i just keep doing it, if they are mean i laugh like a madman and keep doing it (which irritates them more))
it also seems that increasingly from day to day i cant sleep as well as i could the day before, today for example ive had a really hard time falling asleep and and i woke up probably around 1 hour and 15 minutes ago and i don't feel the slightest bit tired, a few days ago i might have tossed and turned a few times but at least i got a decent amount of sleep.
part of why i think the school would think im crazy is the blow stuff out of proportion, like when i had 2 spots at my head that i picked at and made myself bleed, a teacher made me go to the nurse than and, they said i couldnt go back to school until i had it checked out which annoyed me mom a lot, i would hate for the school to think im crazy and call my mom about me cutting myself.